On todays edition of "tales from the chair" we learn from a case of a patient with teh dumb. I didn't actually see this patient myself, it was told to me by a hysterically laughing Dr W who called my cell as soon as said patient left the office.
Patient X comes with with bright red eyes. 
Doc W: So, what brings you in today ? 
Patient: My eyes are really red and itchy.. irritated. 
Doc:  so when did this start ? 
Pt:  Well, they started getting red a few days ago and I thought they were getting infected. So, I went into my medicine cabinet and got out this medicine my VET gave me for my dog's bepharitis. And, I put that in my eyes thinking it would help. 
Doc:  your child's medicine ? or your dogs?  (cuz patients use their kids medicine all the time) 
PT:  my dog's 
Doc:  and it didn't get better did it ? 
Pt :  no, in fact it got so red and ITCHY that I went to CVS and bought this 
anti-itch powder. I thought that would help so I put that in my eyes, too. 
seriously kids, I don't make this stuff up.